From China to Chandni Chowk

No .. we are not reversing the atrocities which we faced thanks to Akshay Kumar on to the Chinese folks. Its more of a moniker to the recent visit by the Chinese Premier Li Keiqang. This visit comes after recent tense border standoff between the two Asian giants. Obviously the two sides did not meet to discuss the current trends and scenarios of contraceptives given that both the nations are population stricken. That discussion is outsourced to Bangladesh, afterall let them atleast contribute something to the World after Shakib Al Hasan.

So coming to the purpose of the visit again, it was basically to discuss the bilateral tensions between the two countires. Premier Li Keqiang met with Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh and the two leaders emphasized that efforts should be made to resolve the border dispute between the two countries which led to a bloody war in early sixties. The minutes of the meeting are interesting though. Li hogged the speaking bandwidth and MMS' interpreter was the relaxed of the lot.

First and foremost, the border issue. There are two aspects: Sino Indian border and South China sea. Both are similar in nature as China has shown agressive tactics in both the regions. And days after encroachment along the border, Li offers a somewhat broken olive branch and takes an affirmative for MMS' silence. Its funny that more Chinese marching towards the border is looked upon as more labour for the 'Chinese Corner' handkarts in the ghettos of Metropolitians.

Second major point Li wanted to emphasize was on bilateral trade. China has become India’s biggest trading partner in recent times. Facts show that two-way trade jumped from $5 billion in 2002 to nearly $75 billion in 2011, although that figure declined to $61.5 billion last year because of the global economic slowdown. However bigger concern is that trade remains heavily skewed in China’s favor. But both sides seem to be quite optimistic that their goal of bringing bilateral trade volume to $100 billion in 2015 is attainable. What this means is that except loads of Chinese plastic goods in Delhi's Pallika Bazaar and Mumbai's Manish Market. One can so imagine Li Keiqang as a new age squinty eyed Santa Claus with no ability  to grow a beard and ready to dump his 'low quality' goods all over your city.

What the F moment here is that Li terms this visit as fresh strategic perspective to look at Indo-China relations and fostering economic relations as well but also makes curious inquiries with our grateful neighbours. China has shored up their relationships with Nepal & Sri Lanka and I am very apathetic to our unworthy western neighbours. As if the Italian governess was not enough to toy with our baby at the helm, that this Chinese baby sitter arrived too.

But there has to be some payback. I say take Li to the various Oriental spas around the city and ask him to recognize who among those masseuses is of Chinese origin. I say take him to Chinese handkart and make him have Chicken manchow soup one by two with fried noodles and extra schezwan. I say make him watch The Myth over and over again and make him thank us for Mallika Sherawat. Last but not the least, I say make him buy a gPhone or an hPhone and use it for a month without repairs. Then dont blame me if Li goes ballistic ...

The Starbucks - India equation !!

Starbucks opened its store for the first time in India .. or is it India opened its doors for the first time for Stabucks. Either way its here now and makes India the 61st country where the popular green neons are displayed. Believe it or not but first store in India comes exactly after 13 years since their operations started in China. Chowmein - 1, Haryana (India) - 0 !!

So what made Starbucks ponder over their strategy or was it pure procrastination ? Well, the Starbucks CEO, Mr. Howard Schultz believed that the tea sipping, chuski taking Indian culture will not welcome the coffee dominated brand with open arms. What he forgot that it is the same target audience which will run after anything which is on display in a branded shop sold at a premium. Second thing was finding a suitable partner to ply their trade. The main factor here was sustainability and no better 'reliance' than Tata !! Mr. Schultz definitely got this one right. Everyone needs a partner in crime. Some actors need their rich producer dads, some cricketers need their talent rich fellow cricketers and some crooked politicians need their drivers. Incredible India !!

So whats the amount of financial benefits are we talking about ? Retail consultancy Technopak Advisors predict India’s $ 230 million cafe market will swell to $ 410 million by 2017, with the number of cafes rising from 1,950 to 2,900 in the next five years. Out of that lot, this joint venture by Starbucks hopes to open 50 stores by the end of 2012. With one at Taj Mahal hotel and other in a suburban mall already waiting to hear the gunshot before the race, it looks like Starbucks will be there surely.

When we look at the possible competitors Cafe Coffee Day, which is owned by an Indian coffee conglomerate based in the southern city of Bangalore, has around 1,350 outlets and is the current market leader. A host of international players, like Gloria Jean’s, Costa Coffee and Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf, are already scrambling to catch up. But the biggest rivals could well be the regional and more traditional coffee makers and providers. Typical Indian mentality will always make the average foodie go for the filter kaapi than the richer cousin.

Enough of the financial benefits and the synergies for the coffe giant, its India as a whole which also enjoys a lot more and infact takes learnings as well. For the Mumbaikars, it offered new backdrops to take photos against. So one will find all teenagers removing their camera phones and tablets and going *click* *click*. Plus the You just checked in at Starbucks, Horniman circle via Foursquare is a different issue altogether. The Medusa-esque coffee mascot of Starbucks stares down at you from a wall.

Secondly, its the free services on offer. Beat the heat and sit in an air conditioned coffee house which can hold upto 120 odd people and with our 'please adjust .. fourth seat' attitude might well as add 30 odd to it.

But finally and most importantly it taught a large set of Mumbaikars the importance of discipline. It taught Mumbai how to stand in queues. Huge lines bigger than those at Sidhivinayak temple on Tuesdays were seen just for the taste of coffee and the post brag too.

Bottomline is that when it comes to Mumbai, if Starbucks even sold 'Gola wala' sherbet for a fortune, people will line up and go gung ho about it. And the author is one of them too !!

The Golden Pompous

Ohh the title bears similarity with a Hollywood movie .. with the animals speaking the mood !! Well its almost the same, the Bulls n the Bears have spoken and yeah Gold is worth its wait .. oops I meant weight !!

Well the gold prices which scaled record highs in the month of August had investors going gaga in the US and Europe. Investors preferred the yellow metal over the fickle minded equity markets.

Priced at Rs. 27136 per 10 gms in January this year, Gold is now enjoying premium price of Rs. 31219 per 10 gms as of September.Now even that cloud is wondering why dint I wait for the golden lining. Although this demand somehow fizzed out in the latter first half of the year largely thanks to slowdown in India & China. It seems like there are no mahurats available for weddings in Kerala !!

Its quite a stat that India & China account for 45% of global demand. Why are Chinese investing so much in Gold rather go and invest in Jackie Chan or Jet Li movies. However investment demand for Gold in particular has fallen in the two Asian giants off late. Gold has acted like that faithful Ramukaka or Deendayal giving steady returns in India over the years. While sensex moved like Abhishek Bachchan's career graph, Gold was the Rahul Dravid of all commodities.

Since Gold prices are denominated in terms of Dollars the equation becomes as clear as an Akshay Kumar movie. The more you see him the less you see other characters in action. Likewise the increase in the price of Gold means a big jolt for Dollar among other currencies.

Under these circumstances come a new wave in the market, the Gold ETFs. This product helps the gold crazy nation to accumulate gold one step at a time with minimum risk of theft or cheating. Transparency being a USP, Gold ETFs have no tax hassles and can become an Indian's best friend if welcomed with open arms.

But no matter what the price is Indians will not end their fascination for the precious metal. Indians are crazy about owning gold. No wonder, that the physical gold held by households in India is more than 15,000 tons, which is the largest in the world. The daughters will continue to get married laden with gold. The middle aged dad will always invest in Gold as a long term investment inspite of better investment options. And yes the festivals, our rich heritage will force even the sane of all to get lured away by the yellow metal. If this madness is not enough, the devotees move up one step ahead and actually are giving gold to Gods.

China 'Bullied' or 'Bears' it all !!!

China seems to be the destination to be ... Investors are looking to get their hands 'red' with a handful of China everywhere. While it is deemed to be THE upcoming market in the world but is it that lucrative for the individual investors ??
China's GDP has increased by almost 4 times in the past decade perhaps making it an awesome investment to buy, even better than owning an ice gola shop in this sweltering heat !!
But GDP does not act as a security, in transition if we look China's stock markets have hardly showed any transition. It seems that the Chinese production is running the marathon while their stock exchanges (Shanghai & Shenzhen) are running the 110 metres hurdles. Liu Xiang dont get worked up, its just a reference !!!
But the blame has to go to the Initial public offering system in place. The prices are heavily over priced for the benefit of bankers and underwriters but there are huge losses on the first day of trading itself. The small time investors have lost the confidence with this pattern. Pretty much like how Bollywood has in Uday Chopra & Tushhar Kapoor.
However off late a new set of rules for stock listing have been injected which would bring in much needed stability to the 'Roller coaster' markets. This would decrease the decade long financial erectile dysfunction and probably help China 'climax' at the right time.

So does that mean that a fast growing country disappoints the investors ? Well the analysts tend to agree.
Stock markets in China and even other fast growing nations came into real existence only in the last two decades as compared to the NASDAQs and the LSEs. Plus there is a severe dilution of individual investors as the investors tend to invest on both the exchanges simultaneously. The exchanges acted as an exit route for companies from their difficulties rather than focussing on investors.
The other main reason is the political and legal scenario engulfing these markets. The insider trading phenomenon had hit them hard. The investors or people in close contact with the inner most circles made substantial profit. Its very much like how the only person to know the syllabus right before the exam is the photocopier guy.
So the Chinese equity markets are in a transition phase and with some serious amendments made, they will make the grade. Till then its less sugar in your tea ... as they say 'Chini kam' !!

Another BRIC in the Wall !!!

Well ... we definitely 'need to be educated' on this topic !! The BRICS which are holding the Wall of World Economy together and resisting the penetration of USA are the group of nations, in whose hands lie the destiny of tomorrow. Meet Brazil, Russia, India, China & South Africa.

Brazil the land of Samba, Football & Mafia is infact an agricultural powerhouse with huge potential for producing  sugar and coffee. So now you know who to curse if the canteen guy increases the coffee price by couple of bucks. What we would like from Brazil in barter is their footballing talent and what we have to offer will only be disclosed at the end. But seriously, with all the kids  in India going the football way its high time that we have a Kaka in our ranks or atleast his nephew.

Secondly Russia, the land of Kalashnikovs and Vodka is a large reserve for Oil & Gas.The largest country by area once upon a time gave USA serious run for their money not just on land but in space too. With names that require a severe use of epiglottis, Russia is coming to recognition once again thanks to their ever fit president Mr. Putin. So what we would like from Russia in barter is 'absolut'ely the Vodka in fact a lifetime supply of it. Some other things came to my mind but that will be done through a private request. *nudge*nudge*wink*wink*

Ni Hao China !! The land where even a 90 year old can kick your ass in a game of table tennis, China is a manufacturing paradise. You name it and they will produce it. Right from needles to aircrafts. This country looks for the future although some of their products does not suggest the same. An immensely huge export driven economy, China holds $ 3.2 trillion of foreign reserves so now you know why Obama frowns when he sees an oriental guy. What we want in barter is Martial arts and the cool shaolin temples. The action will definitely add extra spice to our already rocking movie industry. Plus Mr. Akshay Kumar will have company jumping out of buildings too.

South Africa, the small 's' tagging along the BRIC nations is no more a child. A huge mineral reserve and a host to some of the important sporting events, South Africa is converting its baby steps into long strides now. What we would like from them is .... Charlize Theron .. well thats my little prejudice but who would not want her. Common politicians, stop drooling !!!

So then the question still remains, can the BRICS lay a siege on the domination by the heavyweights like US n UK. With the Euro crisis leading to many countries getting a reality check on how they were working, the BRICS have got a far more efficient work rate and better productivity. With the BRICS Development bank concept ready to come into existence and get the nations even more close one waits to see what the US will do. For starters, more trips to India and China by Obama.

Well as promised, India who believes in sharing will as part of the barter give our very prized asset. I wont add to the suspense any more as all the BRICS ambassadors are looking with a keen eye. Well ... the politicians or the netas ... they really are an asset to our country (or maybe they build lots of assets). They will make the likes of Shangais and Moscows and Rios, the new Patnas & Ranchis of this world. They will earadicate the mafia from your respective countries as they themselves will be the mafia you have to be afraid of in future.See how much we care about you !!! So now since the barter is done, No Returns Pass !!!