The Modi-fied Elections

From the land of Dandi march this certain Mr. Modi gave a big 'Danda' to the Congress and established his supremacy over the state of Gujarat. Narendra Modi got elected for his third successive term thereby celebrating a hat trick of wins. BJP won 115 seats in the 182 seat assembly but 2 seats short of their victory in 2007. This was the third win under the leadership of Modi but will Modi be there in Gujarat the next time around is a big question. The man set to be the next in line for the Prime Minister of the country, will he stick around in his state rather than going for the big prize ?? That we will see in the next episode of Indian Politics Season 4 presented by Fevicol and Zandu Balm !!

But till then there were celebrations and celebrations galore. The oath taking ceremony had a starcast of its own. Some media reports suggested that even Suraj Barjatiya was awed by the ensemble and wants to replicate the same in his next movie. All the top BJP and NDA leaders made their presence felt and yes Vivek Oberoi was there too. Come on, the guy deserves a special mention. It evolved as a promenade for exchanging notes on the direction of Indian politics and yes some basic minuscule gossip as well.

What followed was a showpiece investment meeting with all the top guns of India Inc. The Ambanis, The Tatas, The Roys and the Adanis were present. Its like taking corporate attendance and each one shouting 'Present teacher'. The program suitably monikered Vibrant Gujarat 2013 but should have actually been called the Modi show !! Not to forget delegates form various companies from the first World countries also made their presence felt.

But the overall picture is very happy and everyone is upbeat about the future. There were huge celebrations in Gujarat. Even the Gujjus in Mumbai organized grand morning parties of jalebi and fafda to commemorate this feat followed by Surati Undhiyo. Dalal street swung to the chants of 'One Mr. Modi' and the industrialists and businessmen developed investo-gasms. Please dont even get me started on the Germans and the Japanese. If one has a penchant for English grammar then this can be put as Gujarat happy, India happier and Japan/Germany happiest !!

So for now its time to dance .. not the Dandiya .. its time for Oppa Gujarat Style !!

Thats the last to be heard from yours truly .. well this year !! Dont get so happy !! We meet next year .. until then Happy New Year !!

The Perfect Hedge !!

India .. once called the Land of Gold now can only visualize gold in bulk in either the luggage compartment of cars in the fake chases of RGV movie or on the dashboard of real Bappi Lahiri. India thrives nowadays on its main five pillars. Politics, Religion, Movies, Cricket and Food !! If you are an Indian and if you are plying your trade in one of these five pillars then you my friend will never go high and dry. No, not the Radiohead song. Its just a matter of when to give preference to which pillar and that small entity called success will be cleaning your doormat. And yes that's the layman definition of Hedging.

Hedging as wikipedia would say 'is an investment position intended to offset potential losses/gains that may be incurred by a companion investment'. All of a sudden I am getting this powerful drive to pay my respects to my elders for completing their education sans Google and Wikis of this world. Massive Respect.

So basically hedging would work in such a way that say if you diversify your biz and when one is in doldrums there should be such a system that the other one is high on drums. And if you are shrewd enough, it will be one freaking orchestra !!

Lets all start with the Chuck Norris of all pillars, Politics !! It is the perennial entity atleast in India which has a sort of  demi God status. Its the supreme of all hedges. You can actually support all the other pillars by hedging them against this. When your political leader is unwell, throng the temples which might be owned by that politician in the first place (High chances). So what is not earned through Politics gets you from Religion. On the flip side, if the political party wins go and put loads on the feet of the Gods. Well the right direction is feet to temple to trust to pockets of the same politician. Can we use 'What goes around, comes around' here ?? Genuine Koschan.

Politics and Movies go deep. Step 1: Make your son an actor/actress. Step 2: Invest money in him/her even if he/she is a dumb wit of the first kind. Step 3: Earn in politics, shower in movie distributions and vice versa. If you did not get this, maybe I will explain Latur .. err I mean Later.

Cricket - India's national sport should actually be India's national hedge. It takes care of everything. Match is not interesting, go while your time away by eating, Food sector is equal to sorted !! Cricket career not the brightest .. build some biceps and put on face whitening creams .. some Ghai or Chopra will cast you for sure. Think Kambli .. I meant calmly (Whats wrong with me !!). And to top it all, when your favourite batsman hits a rough patch (Resemblances are uncanny) then visit the nearest temple to perform the maha yagya !! Just for your kind information, Hockey is still the national sport !!

Food cannot be underestimated under any circumstances. Especially when the circumstance is a fast kept by political leader. On one side it gets you sympathy votes for forthcoming elections and vitamin M for the party's treasury. On the other side when the outer world sleeps the phones of the nearby outlets are abuzz with the gourmet demands of the party workers. Gluttony is a small small word !!

Hedging is not as crude as it sounds or as I made it look. Definitely not the the eighth deadly sin. It has to be used in a good way so that you dont go bust. Gone are the days when hedging was just used in reference to botany. Corporates and Individuals alike, all hedge so that they earn the maximum cheese in this rat race. Now we know that the cheese was not just moved for the heck of it, it got hedged.

Aadhar for People, Support for Government

Aadhar is the moniker given to the Unique Identification Number or some of the marketing enthusiasts would say a 'Brand Name' to the entire UIDAI's process. Unique Identification Authority of India is headed by the once software bigwig Mr. Nandan Nilekani. Nilekani who has a successful software career with Infosys and multi million networth but this advisor to the Government tag is more important. Its more like any European football club is proud of its League title and the Domestic cup win but Champions League win is altogether different.

The UIDAI's mandate is to issue every resident a unique identification number linked to the resident's demographic and biometric information, which they can use to identify themselves anywhere in India, and to access a host of benefits and services. So for now the likes of Shamita Shetty and Tanisha will have a unique identity and not just mere star sisters !!

Recently the Aadhar card came into much news as government announced cash transfer rollout. There is a lot of excitement and anxiety both about the Government's stance over this step. Rather than doling out subsidies in the physical format, a model is developed where cash is transferred directly into the accounts of the beneficiaries. The identification of the eligible beneficiaries is sought to be done on the basis of Aadhar cards. This new identification system will be more than 99% fool proof and hence cannot be corrupted. After hearing this, I wonder the Gangarams of this world will break into a jig and develop a new dancing style. #GangaramStyle

But nothing in India is without hurdles. Be it municipal roads for the Indian cars or off late the English spinners for the Indian batting lineup. Then why an exception to this. The main hurdle is rolling out the remaining cards in just over 18 months and the number is huge. Huge enough for an ordinary citizen but not huge enough for an ordinary politician. For one it relates to a number seen in textbooks for other it is the amount of the scam. Yeah, so the amount is somewhere in the region of 38 crores. Expect last minute rush which would lead to increased inefficiency and even duplicity. Another problem to this magnanimous project is the biometrics. For most of the lesser educated population the word 'biometrics' draws parallels from something taken out from movies like Krisshh and Ra.One. So taking biometric prints that to for labourers and farmers is a difficult task in itself plus their prints vary over lifetime. Also iris scans of the population over 60 is largely unreliable. So if you are a farmer above sixty then you are screwed. Loss of identity alert.

Aadhar is solely dependent on National Population Registrar and the cards are issued to the people covered by them so far. Its like a token oriented line, no matter how empty the line looks you have to wait till that idiot ahead of you comes back from his loo break and gets his thing done. #PersonalWoes. Add to that the guessing game played by the government. They are waiting for the iron to get hot so that they can strike, instead only thing getting hot are people's heads. But the irons, the woods and the putters all will be hot when elections cometh. Golf analogy .. Rory or Tiger will get this !!

Its true that current government will use the cash transfer as that dangling carrot in front of Hungry India, Poor India for votes. Initially the subsidies only will be added to the accounts but slowly but steadily pensions, wages and even scholarships will be routed through. Model is foolproof they say. Model is implemented successfully in Brazil they say. We have got jugaad for everything in India they never said. We dont have everything what Brazil has they never said. Pele, Ronaldo, Adriana Lima and Gisele Bundchen just did a collective facepalm.

So then what next? If this goes ahead, anything and everything will be based on Aadhar card only. A certain meaningful 'conditional' cash transfer will go for a toss. Unless levied with meaningful conditions India will not use it wisely. What starts with subsidies and food, fuels and fertilizers will reach to hoarding, gambling and black marketing in no time. Its like double edged sword which even the wielder needs to be wary about.

How we wish some particular qualities can be distributed through the Aadhar system. Some honesty and dignity for our politicians. Some acting talent and class for our film fraternity especially some heroes and heroines. Some shame for the anti social elements and finally some writing talent for the author. Thanks !!

World at large and the small Indian Stamp

All movies have these legendary characters with some of the iconic dialogues and taglines. And yeah the good guy gets all the good ones. Exception being The Joker #MassiveRespect. Well one of them needs no introduction. The name is Bond, James Bond and the car is Mahindra, Mahindra & Mahindra. Well almost !!

Recent turn of events gave rise to the speculation that the fate of iconic British carmaker Aston Martin will be finalized at the hands of none other than Indian auto heavy weight Mahindra & Mahindra. They have come as the frontrunner and will see the deal as more of a strategic investment.

M&M is likely to pick up a minority stake of around 40% and an option to up their ante to 50% over the next two-four years. The transaction may also see fresh equity being issued to M&M based on final valuation. Though the Indian auto giant may have to shell out $190-320 million. Aston Martin is one name which gets all the car lovers drooling and this one time Ford owned brand was sold to Kuwaiti consortium Investment Dar for $767 million. Currently Aston Martin is valued little over $1 billion. If deal goes ahead, M&M will benefit surely as they currently dont have a luxury or sports car to flaunt in their portfolio. The Warwickshire plant of Aston Martin makes two door beauties like Vanquish and Vantage which now India based car manufacturer looks to be at an Ad'Vantage'. But thats not all it seems ... 

Coming are the days when the iconic chases between Bond and his villains will involve Mahindra tractors and would span across sugarcane farms in Northen Punjab. On the flip side, for promotions of their new tractor line Daniel Craig just might come down to sign some autographs-photographs and pose with the lucky winner - Balwinder Singh !!! 

Thats just one iconic brand getting the India stamp and with India rising equation, that day will soon arise when we see some of the following events. Dont take your palms to your face ladies & gentlemen, the day is coming soon.

Starbucks has already entered India with their strategic partner, the Tata group. However one day we will see the Medusa-esque lady will be waving 'Tata' from the green neon to customers taking out Kerala brew and Assam tea in blocks across USA.

Her Majesty the Queen herself would sport on saree style gowns specially designed by Parag and Praful sarees. Madonna's dresses would be straight from the markets of Hill road and Linking road in Bandra, Mumbai. Given a thought and by the judgement of her current style statement, its not totally wrong that this trend has already started. Weird world !!

The likes of Pan Parag and Pataka Chai sit prominently on the boundary billboards of South African test matches. Only some days left that Pan Parag will be proud sponsors of a country's cricket or rugby team. Imagine the look on their face when they realize that what we chew and spit out gets them revenue by sporting on their shirt.

SuperBowl's highest paying advert willo have the tagline 'Kya aapke toothpaste mein namak hain?' while the pyro and fireworks at Olympics will be exclusively from Standard fireworks, Sivakashi.

Last but not the least, Vivek Oberoi and Celina Jaitley will be the poster favs across Manchester and in the New York square. I went too far, didnt I ?? #OkBye

2G: Raja flipped, now Sibal flopped !!

For a country with one of the largest consumer base and the mentality of buying galore, it was that awkward moment as huge money spinning, moolah strumming bands of airwaves went unsold. The government, which had set a reserve price of Rs 14,000 crore for pan-India spectrum was based on some serious number crunching by CAG. These calculations were done to cover the losses as part of the previous sale in 2008. However the government managed a meagre Rs 9,407.64 crore in the auction that lasted barely two days. Even well 'Cook'ed innings by English batsmen in Tests in India last longer.

But the government was under the weather similar to that IT guy just before the appraisals. The targets were locked and garnering Rs 30,000 crore through disinvestment and Rs 28,000 crore by way of sale of spectrum to telecom companies by the end of this fiscal was no easy task. The deficit was 'hot-air' ballooning and the disinvestment also not going the way it intended to which meant that 2G was their 'ParleG' for treasury nourishment.

This was a classic case of inability of striking the iron when it is hot. From Montek to the neighborhood paanwala, it was a unanimous decision that the auction was timed wrongly. But who says nothing can be done. Like for every flop bollywood star Big Boss acts as that moment of comeback to limelight, in the exact same way re-pricing the spectrum at regular intervals and auction of the remaining bandwidth should be a win-win. Scabbers .. oops Mr. Sibal likes this.

So it all started with Raja treating one of the biggest auctions the country has seen aka 2G spectrum one as inventory system of the local grocer. However the First Come First Served scheme was tinkered with and even the Prime minister and other 'not so Prime ones' were as bamboozled as Aussies facing Indian spinners on fifth day Wankhede wicket. The system threw 'Error 404' everytime the word transparency came up and rest as we know is history.

But let us look from another perspective. Would the common people come to know about the problems in the process if not for the hue and cry by CAG and more importantly the Rs 1.76 lakh crore amount doing the rounds. Its India and people pay attention to numbers. Replace the ministers' names with mere barcodes or heavy numbers and people will take notice. What is gone is gone, make ammends and carry on !!

But again we all flock to one common consensus and earmark one reason and carry on. This time the scapegoat is 'The price of the spectrum is too high'. It sounds like a mere statement and its totally unjustified. Firstly, the spectrum is being sold for a block of 20 years. Who knows where the prices vs usage graph will take us in some years. So what happens when India grows at larger rate, the dynamics have to be understood now and the price needs to be factored. Its like how much you convince the movie buffs that its the start of parallel cinema but that one SRK romantic movie brings you back on the level one supposition.

Second, its mere stupidity to price spectrum low just because business is low. Its like asking for discounts for woolen wear in the month of May. Here it may sound appropriate, but sweaters are no telecom spectrums. And if things worked the same everywhere I would be at the non strike seeing Sachin Tendulkar in action *snap*.  So back to reality then.

Third but not the last, the initial price of the spectrum was kept on the lower side to lure foreign money to the country's economy. Now how much of that money went into the economy is a big question. So now Manmohan Singh and his troops have to work on reverse psychology and get their work done.

So then to put it in a nutshell, one knows that the auction will always be in a pickle when there is bad investment scenario looming large, no involvement of the bigwigs, cartelisation, absence of policy changes and ofcourse the high price of spectrum and not proper utlization. It was basically a recipe for disaster and its fitting that Sibal and his entourage owns up.

So Mr. Sibal, snap out from that Bubble !! Wow that rhymed !!

Financography .. when Finance meets Geography !!

As much as the topic sounds a bit weird but how riveting it would be to learn such a subject. Its often conveyed by the so called 'Gurus of Finance' that Finance is not a stand alone thing .. you have to align yourselves with all the avenues adjoining it. Its like Finance is no Chuck Norris, visualize it more like Justice League or the Avengers !! With this we take almost the literal meaning of avenue and the expansive geographies  that go with it. 

Take Fiscal cliff for example. The fiscal cliff is a newly coined term in USA referring to the effect of a number of laws which, if unchanged, could result in tax increases, spending cuts, and a corresponding reduction in the budget deficit beginning in 2013. And you thought it would be one of those specially named geographical appendage along the Grand Canyon. Headlines doing the rounds are 'Rivals dig in as Fiscal cliff deepens' making one think that this is surely a geographical marvel which is being dug upon under the orders of the people in charge. So the wealthy will be taxed more so as to bring parity and improve the economy of the nation. Now this even the Geographers would not mind, even Mr. Eratosthenes !! 

The world of Technical Analysis - A branch of checking stocks, sends the not so finance world in a tizzy. There are peaks and there are troughs which are actually the measures to see price levels and not the means for cartographers to draw maps on. However both have this common thread - pressure. While the geographic counterparts develop as a result of the air and ground pressure all along, their financial namesakes develop due to buying and selling pressure of the stocks and scrips.

Then there are wedges, not sand nor green, they are technical analysis patterns which forecast market trends. Again Geography waits behind in the queue like geeks after the cool guys devoid of existence.

Now for Time to bring some History to the mix. Bretton Woods is an epoch event not just for USA but for the World at large as it is here that the exchange rate system involving gold and US dollars came into existence. By mere one look at the word, it sounds more like the one next to Yellowstone Park where Yogi Bear & BooBoo would venture out in search for picnic baskets.

American, European & Bermuda options are all terms in the Derivatives segment. All are means of exercising the option on or before the expiry of the contract and not some continent oriented avenues for the people on a vacation. As for Bermuda, I would be immensely happy if people mistake it for the island of notoriety and not for a piece of clothing worn by the great Govinda !!

Basel Accords are not the pre decided tourist spots in a Yashraj movie, they are infact the principles adopted for banking regulations. So now you know one more thing apart from Roger Federer to come out of Switzerland and which is important. Ouch !!

Upstream is just the methodology of exploration in oil industry and not the way in which the fishes swim. For a minute even Moby Dick got excited. Sorry thats the only famous fish I know. Technically a mammal. Damn this is hard !!

Shogun and Tankan are not Japanese mountain peaks. They are merely public offerings and public information systems in the Land of the Rising Sun. But who would blame the land where a mere plumber teaches a kid martial arts and makes him win a big tournament involving big bullies. Ohh wait .. was it Chinese ?!?! Can the real Mr. Miyagi please stand up !!

There are many more instances where Finance weds Geography and a confused term is born as a result of this wedlock. Keep calm and let the term find its own existence in this finance crazy world.

Heard this fact very often that dont judge the book by its cover. Taking the proverb forward, I promise that I wont judge the financial term by its geographical relation. Is it too late to put this under my New Year resolution, coz this seems feasible.

United States: Divided State of Elections !!!

And its settled Barack Obama got re-elected as the President of United States for another 4 years after beating Mitt Romney 275 to 203 votes. More like the first time we heard that a Donkey had the option to say 'Kiss My Ass' to an Elephant. The iconic tweet of 'Four More Years' got spread faster than ants in a sugar factory with 800 odd thousand retweets around the world. The appointment was met with admiration and love. If it was for any Indian politician 'Four More Years' would have been expressed in a different tone altogether !!

So then Mr. Obama has extended his mayorship of White House on Foursquare. But with him at the helm, I think the new paint job for the White house is a must. Simply because the white needs to be more brighter for the new President. Disclaimer: No racist remarks involved, not even thought. So the celebrations went on with great joy and pomp. Even I did not think twice before celebrating and enjoyed this moment with a couple of Dark Chocolate Brownies ... yeah coz they are my favorites !! What did you think ??

So lets see how the finances went ... Obama had UCLA, Microsoft, Google & Harvard University as the main contributors while Romney had all the financial bigwigs namely Goldman Sachs, Bank of America, Morgan Stanley & Credit Suisse. It gives me the feel of a typical stables animosity from WWE where five guys from each side go at each other in a Tag team or a Lumber jack match !! Basically it shows the divided state of United States. Thats the first time I am using Antithesis since school !!

So now the man has taken his seat, what it means for people at large. The US of A, the World and most importantly India. Obama is facing whats called a fiscal cliff and its not one found along the Grand Canyon. If this is not resolved, US economy could face $600 billion worth of tax hikes and public spending cuts. More than his own rating, he now has to worry about whether US gets a credit rating knock. A downgrade for US is bad for the whole world .. its similar to how one bad SRK film makes the entire Bollywood sit and think. Tushar Kapoor & Uday Chopra are glad that I did not use their reference but what they fail to register is that we are talking about occasional flops. I hope they get it at some point.

But there is good news for India all around. US economy is showing signs of recovery although the unemployment rate is still high. However the easy money policy under Obama will mean more funds to be invested in emerging markets. This just in: Dalal street is celebrating !! Needless to say IT services will grow and expect more business. Along with IT, Pharma companies will gain from Obama's health plan. More like Pharma getting their new lease of life.

But there is this one thing pending ... So now we all wait for Mr. Arvind Kejriwal to come up to the podium and expose Mr. Obama. Yes, thats happening !!